#151 - What's the Hardest Part of Learning Engilsh?

September 14, 2022

While on Discord the other day, one of our members asked me what I think the hardest part of learning English is. It's not phrasal verbs, prepositions, or pronunciation. In fact, the hardest part of learning English has nothing to do with the language itself.

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[00:00:00] Life in English 151. What's the hardest part or the hardest thing about learning English? Take fucking three, by the way, I think. Alright shawty, let's do this goddamn thing. Let's do it. Make sure my mic is correctly positioned for the optimal listening experience. And let's get started. Alright. I was talking with our friends on Discord the other day, and an interesting question came up in conversation. What's the biggest problem for people learning English?

[00:00:47] One of the biggest problems that people have when they're learning English is that they approach the language the same way they approached math and science in high school. One plus one equals two. This war happened on this day. This element has three protons and that one has six electrons. A lot of people think they can take a class by a course, memorize some information, pass a test, and then they'll officially be fluent in English. I mean, that's the way we did it in school. Right? But let me ask you something, how much of the stuff you learned in school do you actually remember? My guess is less than 10%. And why is that? Because you never found a use for all that information you were told to memorize. And let me ask you another question, have you ever forgotten how to speak your first language? Of course not. And why is that? Because you use it every single day.

[00:01:47] So I've noticed that a lot of people have a hard time getting out of their own way. They slow themselves down by trying to memorize words and grammar rules. They waste countless hours watching YouTube videos and TV series, taking notes and trying to understand what's being said. And I say that's a waste of time, because after all of that, they never put it into practice with real people. Another problem English learners have, or really people in general, is that they don't value their education. After four years of teaching English online, I noticed that a lot of people treat their education the way they treat their entertainment. They want it cheap, fast, and easy. And what I mean is when you want to be entertained, you pay a certain amount of money. And in exchange for that money, someone or something works to entertain you. You pay. They work. You enjoy.

[00:02:42] And I've seen so many of you make the mistake of setting the same expectation for your learning process. You think you can pay for a result? In your mind, you pay a certain amount of money and in exchange for that money, someone or something will work to educate you. You pay. They work. You learn. And to make it even worse, you want to pay the least amount of money possible for the most important asset you will ever possess. Your education. For four years now, I've heard countless people ask the same questions. "Is it free?" "Can I have a discount?" "Do I have to pay for it?" "How much does it cost?" "Do you offer refunds?" I'm not exaggerating when I tell you that not a single person in four years has asked me, "How is this going to help me improve?" "What makes this different from the other options I have?" "Who exactly was this made for?" "How am I supposed to use this to improve?"

[00:03:46] If you don't know how to do anything, you're of no use to anyone. And people who are of no use to anyone have a hard time functioning in society. They don't have many friends. They don't attract romantic partners. They can't get jobs. Life just sucks when you don't know how to do anything. And I don't mean to be harsh. It's just a fact. And you can only do what you know how to do. I know that sounds simple. I'm not trying to talk to you like you're stupid, but you can only do what you know how to do and everything you know how to do. You either learned on your own through trial and error, or someone taught you how to do it. So why the fuck are you taking your education so lightly, bro? Why are you acting like it's something that can wait or something that can be obtained passively? Why are you willing to pay more for luxury than education?

[00:04:41] Without a proper education, you are fucked, bro. We all know this. So if we want to be educated, we've got to sacrifice the desire for instant gratification and simply put in the time and the effort, and quite possibly invest the money in order to acquire a skill that will enable us to meet more people, make more money, and take advantage of more opportunities in life. Another huge problem that English learners all around the world have is that they make excuses. So many excuses. "I can't afford classes." "I don't live in an English speaking country." "I don't have anyone to practice with." "I don't have time to practice my English." "I don't know how to learn English." But it's all bullshit.

[00:05:30] If you're listening to this, then that means you've got access to the Internet. And if you've got access to the Internet, then that means you have everything you need to learn any widely spoken language in the world, especially English. Private classes, group classes, online courses, YouTube videos, TV series, language exchange apps, Discord servers, podcasts, books, writing tools. You can access the majority of the things I just mentioned for free. You just got to be practical and put in the fucking work every single day. There are no shortcuts and there's no amount of money you can pay to have someone else learn something for you. A lot of you are out here saying you want to learn this language, but what you mean to say is it would be nice to learn this language, and that's completely different.

[00:06:21] When you truly want something, you do whatever is necessary to get it. If you're truly thirsty, you will find a way to get yourself something to drink. If you're truly hungry, you will find a way to get yourself some food. It would be nice to have $1,000,000, for example, but that's not really what you want. And we know that for a fact because you're not doing anything to make that happen right now. It would be nice to speak English fluently, but that's not really what you want. And we know that to be true because you're not putting in the work to make it happen. What you most likely want is to be able to spend a few dollars in a couple of weeks watching videos and to magically wake up and speak this language fluently. So a lot of you just need to cut the bullshit, stop making excuses, and determine what it is you really want.

[00:07:12] And if what you want is to speak English fluently, then you've got to read every day. You've got to write every day. You've got to listen every day. And you've got to speak every single day. Once it's truly a priority of yours, you'll naturally make time for it, just like the rest of your priorities. Now, I'm sure this isn't the nicest thing you've heard today, but my intention is to help you get out of your own way and start making real progress, not to tell you what sounds good. I'm here to keep it real with you. And on some real shit, a lot of y'all aren't making progress because you're just too busy making excuses.

[00:07:51] Now, another huge problem that English learners have is that they refuse to become good listeners and learn the art of communication. Listening attentively is such an underrated skill. And there are two types of attentive listening you need to develop. The first one is all about pattern recognition. Now I realized that I have to be careful when I talk about things like this, because sometimes I tell you to do something that comes naturally to me. But I forget that what's easy for me might be extremely difficult for you. But my point is the same. Being able to recognize patterns is one of three reasons I've managed to learn two foreign languages by myself. Giving all of my attention to the person I was listening to and recognizing that I can derive meaning from their tone of voice. They always connect these words in a particular way. People from this particular walk of life express themselves in this particular way. They always reference the time of day at the beginning of their sentences. The subject can go at the beginning or the end of the sentence. Some people pronounce their words this way and other people pronounce their words that way.

[00:09:02] Recognizing those patterns makes it so much easier to understand people when they speak and identify words and phrases that are commonly used by most people. And the second reason I was able to learn two foreign languages by myself is the second type of attentive listening you need to develop. And this form of attentive listening is all about listening with the intention of understanding what's being communicated instead of simply listening with the intention of responding to what's being said. A lot of people listen solely for the sake of responding. They don't want to listen, understand, and learn. They just want to be heard. And the problem is, no one enjoys speaking to a poor listener. No one enjoys being interrupted constantly. No one enjoys feeling like they're speaking to a wall. And no one enjoys feeling like they're not interesting enough to be listened to.

[00:09:59] So if you're a poor listener, you won't be very much fun to speak with. And that means you probably won't have many people to speak with. And that means it's going to be really hard for you to make friends and improve your spoken English. So I'm asking you to invest some serious time into learning the art of communication. Learn how conversations work. Pay attention to the differences in cultural communication styles. Use the context of a situation to infer what's being communicated. Learn how to ask questions. Understand the role that silence plays in a conversation. Learn how to encourage people to tell you more about something. Learn how to start a conversation. Learn how to keep a conversation going. Learn how to end a conversation.

[00:10:44] You must develop the skill of being able to talk to anyone anytime, anywhere. That is how you take advantage of every opportunity to practice your English. That is how you understand and internalize what's being communicated even if you don't understand every word. That is how you make new friends. That is how you discover new opportunities to make your life and the lives of those around you richer. Spoken language is learned through conversation. So it's in your best interest to learn how to have a conversation. And that has nothing to do with the language you speak. It all starts and ends with good communication skills.

[00:11:28] Now, the third reason I was able to learn these languages by myself is simply that I really wanted to do it. When I was learning Spanish, I would study and practice for 3 to 4 hours a day. Literally all my free time. I spoke Portuguese every day for four years straight, bro. And I didn't even go to Brazil until year three. I didn't spend a single dollar on a course. I didn't take a single class. Nothing like that. I simply used my curiosity to my advantage. I learned how to listen attentively. And I talked to people.

[END OF EPISODE]

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[00:00:00] Life in English 151. What's the hardest part or the hardest thing about learning English? Take fucking three, by the way, I think. Alright shawty, let's do this goddamn thing. Let's do it. Make sure my mic is correctly positioned for the optimal listening experience. And let's get started. Alright. I was talking with our friends on Discord the other day, and an interesting question came up in conversation. What's the biggest problem for people learning English?

[00:00:47] One of the biggest problems that people have when they're learning English is that they approach the language the same way they approached math and science in high school. One plus one equals two. This war happened on this day. This element has three protons and that one has six electrons. A lot of people think they can take a class by a course, memorize some information, pass a test, and then they'll officially be fluent in English. I mean, that's the way we did it in school. Right? But let me ask you something, how much of the stuff you learned in school do you actually remember? My guess is less than 10%. And why is that? Because you never found a use for all that information you were told to memorize. And let me ask you another question, have you ever forgotten how to speak your first language? Of course not. And why is that? Because you use it every single day.

[00:01:47] So I've noticed that a lot of people have a hard time getting out of their own way. They slow themselves down by trying to memorize words and grammar rules. They waste countless hours watching YouTube videos and TV series, taking notes and trying to understand what's being said. And I say that's a waste of time, because after all of that, they never put it into practice with real people. Another problem English learners have, or really people in general, is that they don't value their education. After four years of teaching English online, I noticed that a lot of people treat their education the way they treat their entertainment. They want it cheap, fast, and easy. And what I mean is when you want to be entertained, you pay a certain amount of money. And in exchange for that money, someone or something works to entertain you. You pay. They work. You enjoy.

[00:02:42] And I've seen so many of you make the mistake of setting the same expectation for your learning process. You think you can pay for a result? In your mind, you pay a certain amount of money and in exchange for that money, someone or something will work to educate you. You pay. They work. You learn. And to make it even worse, you want to pay the least amount of money possible for the most important asset you will ever possess. Your education. For four years now, I've heard countless people ask the same questions. "Is it free?" "Can I have a discount?" "Do I have to pay for it?" "How much does it cost?" "Do you offer refunds?" I'm not exaggerating when I tell you that not a single person in four years has asked me, "How is this going to help me improve?" "What makes this different from the other options I have?" "Who exactly was this made for?" "How am I supposed to use this to improve?"

[00:03:46] If you don't know how to do anything, you're of no use to anyone. And people who are of no use to anyone have a hard time functioning in society. They don't have many friends. They don't attract romantic partners. They can't get jobs. Life just sucks when you don't know how to do anything. And I don't mean to be harsh. It's just a fact. And you can only do what you know how to do. I know that sounds simple. I'm not trying to talk to you like you're stupid, but you can only do what you know how to do and everything you know how to do. You either learned on your own through trial and error, or someone taught you how to do it. So why the fuck are you taking your education so lightly, bro? Why are you acting like it's something that can wait or something that can be obtained passively? Why are you willing to pay more for luxury than education?

[00:04:41] Without a proper education, you are fucked, bro. We all know this. So if we want to be educated, we've got to sacrifice the desire for instant gratification and simply put in the time and the effort, and quite possibly invest the money in order to acquire a skill that will enable us to meet more people, make more money, and take advantage of more opportunities in life. Another huge problem that English learners all around the world have is that they make excuses. So many excuses. "I can't afford classes." "I don't live in an English speaking country." "I don't have anyone to practice with." "I don't have time to practice my English." "I don't know how to learn English." But it's all bullshit.

[00:05:30] If you're listening to this, then that means you've got access to the Internet. And if you've got access to the Internet, then that means you have everything you need to learn any widely spoken language in the world, especially English. Private classes, group classes, online courses, YouTube videos, TV series, language exchange apps, Discord servers, podcasts, books, writing tools. You can access the majority of the things I just mentioned for free. You just got to be practical and put in the fucking work every single day. There are no shortcuts and there's no amount of money you can pay to have someone else learn something for you. A lot of you are out here saying you want to learn this language, but what you mean to say is it would be nice to learn this language, and that's completely different.

[00:06:21] When you truly want something, you do whatever is necessary to get it. If you're truly thirsty, you will find a way to get yourself something to drink. If you're truly hungry, you will find a way to get yourself some food. It would be nice to have $1,000,000, for example, but that's not really what you want. And we know that for a fact because you're not doing anything to make that happen right now. It would be nice to speak English fluently, but that's not really what you want. And we know that to be true because you're not putting in the work to make it happen. What you most likely want is to be able to spend a few dollars in a couple of weeks watching videos and to magically wake up and speak this language fluently. So a lot of you just need to cut the bullshit, stop making excuses, and determine what it is you really want.

[00:07:12] And if what you want is to speak English fluently, then you've got to read every day. You've got to write every day. You've got to listen every day. And you've got to speak every single day. Once it's truly a priority of yours, you'll naturally make time for it, just like the rest of your priorities. Now, I'm sure this isn't the nicest thing you've heard today, but my intention is to help you get out of your own way and start making real progress, not to tell you what sounds good. I'm here to keep it real with you. And on some real shit, a lot of y'all aren't making progress because you're just too busy making excuses.

[00:07:51] Now, another huge problem that English learners have is that they refuse to become good listeners and learn the art of communication. Listening attentively is such an underrated skill. And there are two types of attentive listening you need to develop. The first one is all about pattern recognition. Now I realized that I have to be careful when I talk about things like this, because sometimes I tell you to do something that comes naturally to me. But I forget that what's easy for me might be extremely difficult for you. But my point is the same. Being able to recognize patterns is one of three reasons I've managed to learn two foreign languages by myself. Giving all of my attention to the person I was listening to and recognizing that I can derive meaning from their tone of voice. They always connect these words in a particular way. People from this particular walk of life express themselves in this particular way. They always reference the time of day at the beginning of their sentences. The subject can go at the beginning or the end of the sentence. Some people pronounce their words this way and other people pronounce their words that way.

[00:09:02] Recognizing those patterns makes it so much easier to understand people when they speak and identify words and phrases that are commonly used by most people. And the second reason I was able to learn two foreign languages by myself is the second type of attentive listening you need to develop. And this form of attentive listening is all about listening with the intention of understanding what's being communicated instead of simply listening with the intention of responding to what's being said. A lot of people listen solely for the sake of responding. They don't want to listen, understand, and learn. They just want to be heard. And the problem is, no one enjoys speaking to a poor listener. No one enjoys being interrupted constantly. No one enjoys feeling like they're speaking to a wall. And no one enjoys feeling like they're not interesting enough to be listened to.

[00:09:59] So if you're a poor listener, you won't be very much fun to speak with. And that means you probably won't have many people to speak with. And that means it's going to be really hard for you to make friends and improve your spoken English. So I'm asking you to invest some serious time into learning the art of communication. Learn how conversations work. Pay attention to the differences in cultural communication styles. Use the context of a situation to infer what's being communicated. Learn how to ask questions. Understand the role that silence plays in a conversation. Learn how to encourage people to tell you more about something. Learn how to start a conversation. Learn how to keep a conversation going. Learn how to end a conversation.

[00:10:44] You must develop the skill of being able to talk to anyone anytime, anywhere. That is how you take advantage of every opportunity to practice your English. That is how you understand and internalize what's being communicated even if you don't understand every word. That is how you make new friends. That is how you discover new opportunities to make your life and the lives of those around you richer. Spoken language is learned through conversation. So it's in your best interest to learn how to have a conversation. And that has nothing to do with the language you speak. It all starts and ends with good communication skills.

[00:11:28] Now, the third reason I was able to learn these languages by myself is simply that I really wanted to do it. When I was learning Spanish, I would study and practice for 3 to 4 hours a day. Literally all my free time. I spoke Portuguese every day for four years straight, bro. And I didn't even go to Brazil until year three. I didn't spend a single dollar on a course. I didn't take a single class. Nothing like that. I simply used my curiosity to my advantage. I learned how to listen attentively. And I talked to people.

[END OF EPISODE]

Writing prompts

  • What do you think is the hardest thing about learning English?
  • In your opinion, what's is the most effective way to learn a language?
  • Do you disagree with anything that was said? If so, why?
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Transcript

[00:00:00] Life in English 151. What's the hardest part or the hardest thing about learning English? Take fucking three, by the way, I think. Alright shawty, let's do this goddamn thing. Let's do it. Make sure my mic is correctly positioned for the optimal listening experience. And let's get started. Alright. I was talking with our friends on Discord the other day, and an interesting question came up in conversation. What's the biggest problem for people learning English?

[00:00:47] One of the biggest problems that people have when they're learning English is that they approach the language the same way they approached math and science in high school. One plus one equals two. This war happened on this day. This element has three protons and that one has six electrons. A lot of people think they can take a class by a course, memorize some information, pass a test, and then they'll officially be fluent in English. I mean, that's the way we did it in school. Right? But let me ask you something, how much of the stuff you learned in school do you actually remember? My guess is less than 10%. And why is that? Because you never found a use for all that information you were told to memorize. And let me ask you another question, have you ever forgotten how to speak your first language? Of course not. And why is that? Because you use it every single day.

[00:01:47] So I've noticed that a lot of people have a hard time getting out of their own way. They slow themselves down by trying to memorize words and grammar rules. They waste countless hours watching YouTube videos and TV series, taking notes and trying to understand what's being said. And I say that's a waste of time, because after all of that, they never put it into practice with real people. Another problem English learners have, or really people in general, is that they don't value their education. After four years of teaching English online, I noticed that a lot of people treat their education the way they treat their entertainment. They want it cheap, fast, and easy. And what I mean is when you want to be entertained, you pay a certain amount of money. And in exchange for that money, someone or something works to entertain you. You pay. They work. You enjoy.

[00:02:42] And I've seen so many of you make the mistake of setting the same expectation for your learning process. You think you can pay for a result? In your mind, you pay a certain amount of money and in exchange for that money, someone or something will work to educate you. You pay. They work. You learn. And to make it even worse, you want to pay the least amount of money possible for the most important asset you will ever possess. Your education. For four years now, I've heard countless people ask the same questions. "Is it free?" "Can I have a discount?" "Do I have to pay for it?" "How much does it cost?" "Do you offer refunds?" I'm not exaggerating when I tell you that not a single person in four years has asked me, "How is this going to help me improve?" "What makes this different from the other options I have?" "Who exactly was this made for?" "How am I supposed to use this to improve?"

[00:03:46] If you don't know how to do anything, you're of no use to anyone. And people who are of no use to anyone have a hard time functioning in society. They don't have many friends. They don't attract romantic partners. They can't get jobs. Life just sucks when you don't know how to do anything. And I don't mean to be harsh. It's just a fact. And you can only do what you know how to do. I know that sounds simple. I'm not trying to talk to you like you're stupid, but you can only do what you know how to do and everything you know how to do. You either learned on your own through trial and error, or someone taught you how to do it. So why the fuck are you taking your education so lightly, bro? Why are you acting like it's something that can wait or something that can be obtained passively? Why are you willing to pay more for luxury than education?

[00:04:41] Without a proper education, you are fucked, bro. We all know this. So if we want to be educated, we've got to sacrifice the desire for instant gratification and simply put in the time and the effort, and quite possibly invest the money in order to acquire a skill that will enable us to meet more people, make more money, and take advantage of more opportunities in life. Another huge problem that English learners all around the world have is that they make excuses. So many excuses. "I can't afford classes." "I don't live in an English speaking country." "I don't have anyone to practice with." "I don't have time to practice my English." "I don't know how to learn English." But it's all bullshit.

[00:05:30] If you're listening to this, then that means you've got access to the Internet. And if you've got access to the Internet, then that means you have everything you need to learn any widely spoken language in the world, especially English. Private classes, group classes, online courses, YouTube videos, TV series, language exchange apps, Discord servers, podcasts, books, writing tools. You can access the majority of the things I just mentioned for free. You just got to be practical and put in the fucking work every single day. There are no shortcuts and there's no amount of money you can pay to have someone else learn something for you. A lot of you are out here saying you want to learn this language, but what you mean to say is it would be nice to learn this language, and that's completely different.

[00:06:21] When you truly want something, you do whatever is necessary to get it. If you're truly thirsty, you will find a way to get yourself something to drink. If you're truly hungry, you will find a way to get yourself some food. It would be nice to have $1,000,000, for example, but that's not really what you want. And we know that for a fact because you're not doing anything to make that happen right now. It would be nice to speak English fluently, but that's not really what you want. And we know that to be true because you're not putting in the work to make it happen. What you most likely want is to be able to spend a few dollars in a couple of weeks watching videos and to magically wake up and speak this language fluently. So a lot of you just need to cut the bullshit, stop making excuses, and determine what it is you really want.

[00:07:12] And if what you want is to speak English fluently, then you've got to read every day. You've got to write every day. You've got to listen every day. And you've got to speak every single day. Once it's truly a priority of yours, you'll naturally make time for it, just like the rest of your priorities. Now, I'm sure this isn't the nicest thing you've heard today, but my intention is to help you get out of your own way and start making real progress, not to tell you what sounds good. I'm here to keep it real with you. And on some real shit, a lot of y'all aren't making progress because you're just too busy making excuses.

[00:07:51] Now, another huge problem that English learners have is that they refuse to become good listeners and learn the art of communication. Listening attentively is such an underrated skill. And there are two types of attentive listening you need to develop. The first one is all about pattern recognition. Now I realized that I have to be careful when I talk about things like this, because sometimes I tell you to do something that comes naturally to me. But I forget that what's easy for me might be extremely difficult for you. But my point is the same. Being able to recognize patterns is one of three reasons I've managed to learn two foreign languages by myself. Giving all of my attention to the person I was listening to and recognizing that I can derive meaning from their tone of voice. They always connect these words in a particular way. People from this particular walk of life express themselves in this particular way. They always reference the time of day at the beginning of their sentences. The subject can go at the beginning or the end of the sentence. Some people pronounce their words this way and other people pronounce their words that way.

[00:09:02] Recognizing those patterns makes it so much easier to understand people when they speak and identify words and phrases that are commonly used by most people. And the second reason I was able to learn two foreign languages by myself is the second type of attentive listening you need to develop. And this form of attentive listening is all about listening with the intention of understanding what's being communicated instead of simply listening with the intention of responding to what's being said. A lot of people listen solely for the sake of responding. They don't want to listen, understand, and learn. They just want to be heard. And the problem is, no one enjoys speaking to a poor listener. No one enjoys being interrupted constantly. No one enjoys feeling like they're speaking to a wall. And no one enjoys feeling like they're not interesting enough to be listened to.

[00:09:59] So if you're a poor listener, you won't be very much fun to speak with. And that means you probably won't have many people to speak with. And that means it's going to be really hard for you to make friends and improve your spoken English. So I'm asking you to invest some serious time into learning the art of communication. Learn how conversations work. Pay attention to the differences in cultural communication styles. Use the context of a situation to infer what's being communicated. Learn how to ask questions. Understand the role that silence plays in a conversation. Learn how to encourage people to tell you more about something. Learn how to start a conversation. Learn how to keep a conversation going. Learn how to end a conversation.

[00:10:44] You must develop the skill of being able to talk to anyone anytime, anywhere. That is how you take advantage of every opportunity to practice your English. That is how you understand and internalize what's being communicated even if you don't understand every word. That is how you make new friends. That is how you discover new opportunities to make your life and the lives of those around you richer. Spoken language is learned through conversation. So it's in your best interest to learn how to have a conversation. And that has nothing to do with the language you speak. It all starts and ends with good communication skills.

[00:11:28] Now, the third reason I was able to learn these languages by myself is simply that I really wanted to do it. When I was learning Spanish, I would study and practice for 3 to 4 hours a day. Literally all my free time. I spoke Portuguese every day for four years straight, bro. And I didn't even go to Brazil until year three. I didn't spend a single dollar on a course. I didn't take a single class. Nothing like that. I simply used my curiosity to my advantage. I learned how to listen attentively. And I talked to people.

[END OF EPISODE]

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