#156 - The Best Way to Feel Better about Yourself

October 19, 2022

If you’re feeling bad about yourself, if you’re feeling insecure, if you’re feeling like you have nothing to offer the world, then I’ve got a quick message for you.

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[00:00:00] What's up, my friend? If you're feeling bad about yourself, if you're feeling insecure, if you're feeling like you have nothing to offer the world, then I've got a quick message for you. Now, before I can get my message across to you, I need you to think about something first. Cristiano Ronaldo. Lionel Messi. LeBron James. Gary Vaynerchuk. Jeff Bezos. What do all of these men have in common? You might say things like they're all rich, famous, and the best at what they do. And those things may be true, but there's something even deeper and more important that led them all to be rich, famous, and incredibly successful.

[00:00:45] Confidence. One cannot accomplish great things in life without confidence in oneself. Confidence comes from one or two places. Number one, someone who believes in you so much that you begin to believe in yourself. Number two, watching yourself do something you didn't know or believe you could do in the first place. Now, assuming you don't have the former, because many of us don't, you'll need to do the latter. See what I'm saying? You need to do something. You need to accomplish something.

[00:01:19] And why do you think a lot of people who go to the gym regularly tend to have lots of confidence? It's because they're constantly choosing to do something difficult. They're constantly watching themselves achieve a difficult task. They know that while everyone else is at home on the couch watching Netflix, eating junk food, and scrolling on social media, they are at the gym lifting heavy shit. Not because it's their favorite thing to do in the world, but because they know it's good for them. And I'm obviously generalizing. They know they're neither better nor worse than other people, but they're certainly on a different level. They're the type of people who take on challenges voluntarily and they don't quit when shit gets difficult. They know they're capable of being consistent. They show up again and again and again, month after month, year after year. And they don't see results immediately, and that's okay, because they know how to defer gratification in order to receive a greater reward in the future.

[00:02:26] Watching oneself go from 100 kilos to 75 kilos breeds confidence. It also increases the chance that one will like what they see when they look in the mirror, which will breed even more confidence. And it's also a constant reminder that no matter how bad things get, one is capable of turning one's life around. That knowledge breeds confidence in oneself. What about Cristiano Ronaldo? Why do you think he has so much confidence, so much confidence that people think he's an arrogant human being? Why do you think that is? I think it's because he wasn't born a footballing genius. He had to work his ass off every single day for years. Years of blood, sweat, and tears to get to where he is today. Right? No one gave that to him. He decided he was going to be the best footballer he could possibly be, and he worked toward that goal every day until he realized it. In fact, he continues to realize it, right? Because greatness is a lifestyle. It's a mentality. It's not a destination.

[00:03:32] You wanna party, chase girls, and get drunk with your friends? That's cool. Imma be at the gym working on my endurance, agility, and strength. You're thinking about how much money you can make, but I'm thinking about how I can perform better than my competition, because that always leads to more money. You see what I'm saying? Cristiano Ronaldo has watched himself become one of the best football players to ever play the game professionally. But no one has ever kicked a single ball for him. No one has ever showed up to practice for him. He chose to take on a difficult task, learn a skill and improve it, and to try to be the best version of himself every single day. And from what I understand, he also has an incredibly loving and supportive mother, and that can make any man unstoppable in this game we call life.

[00:04:25] So if you don't feel confident in yourself, if you feel like you have nothing to offer, what do you think you should do? Do something you can be proud of. You're already learning how to communicate in English, and that's something no one can do for you. It's also something no one can take from you. That's something you can be proud of. Commit to hitting the gym consistently and getting in shape, learn how to play the saxophone, go to more social functions and talk to people until you're no longer afraid of them. Quit doing drugs. Create unique and engaging content that can't be found anywhere else. Just do something. Just fucking do something. Anything, bro. Just do something.

[00:05:12] When you have hobbies, when you when you take on difficult tasks, you don't have time to wallow in self-pity and fucking negativity and obsess over all your shortcomings because you're too busy doing shit. You see what I'm saying? You'll have things to talk about when somebody asks you, "What the fuck are you doing with your life?" This naturally makes you a more interesting person, which naturally makes you more confident. You'll come to realize that the only person's approval you really need is your own. When you truly feel good about yourself, you don't really care how other people feel about you.

[00:05:49] So how do you start feeling better about yourself? By working on yourself, by investing in yourself, by spending your time doing difficult, productive, and or creative things voluntarily. So at some point today, I want you to take a long, hard look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself the following. Number one. What exactly...or excuse me, why exactly don't I feel good about myself? Is it because I don't know how to do anything valuable? Is it because of toxic people in my life? What's the reason? What's the source of this feeling? Number two. What's a valuable skill? I'd like to know. Software development, carpentry, sustainable agriculture...it could be anything. It really doesn't matter. And number three, what's the simplest thing I can do to get started immediately? It's hard to spend time feeling bad about yourself when you're already spending all of your free time trying to improve yourself. So get to work.

[END OF EPISODE]

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[00:00:00] What's up, my friend? If you're feeling bad about yourself, if you're feeling insecure, if you're feeling like you have nothing to offer the world, then I've got a quick message for you. Now, before I can get my message across to you, I need you to think about something first. Cristiano Ronaldo. Lionel Messi. LeBron James. Gary Vaynerchuk. Jeff Bezos. What do all of these men have in common? You might say things like they're all rich, famous, and the best at what they do. And those things may be true, but there's something even deeper and more important that led them all to be rich, famous, and incredibly successful.

[00:00:45] Confidence. One cannot accomplish great things in life without confidence in oneself. Confidence comes from one or two places. Number one, someone who believes in you so much that you begin to believe in yourself. Number two, watching yourself do something you didn't know or believe you could do in the first place. Now, assuming you don't have the former, because many of us don't, you'll need to do the latter. See what I'm saying? You need to do something. You need to accomplish something.

[00:01:19] And why do you think a lot of people who go to the gym regularly tend to have lots of confidence? It's because they're constantly choosing to do something difficult. They're constantly watching themselves achieve a difficult task. They know that while everyone else is at home on the couch watching Netflix, eating junk food, and scrolling on social media, they are at the gym lifting heavy shit. Not because it's their favorite thing to do in the world, but because they know it's good for them. And I'm obviously generalizing. They know they're neither better nor worse than other people, but they're certainly on a different level. They're the type of people who take on challenges voluntarily and they don't quit when shit gets difficult. They know they're capable of being consistent. They show up again and again and again, month after month, year after year. And they don't see results immediately, and that's okay, because they know how to defer gratification in order to receive a greater reward in the future.

[00:02:26] Watching oneself go from 100 kilos to 75 kilos breeds confidence. It also increases the chance that one will like what they see when they look in the mirror, which will breed even more confidence. And it's also a constant reminder that no matter how bad things get, one is capable of turning one's life around. That knowledge breeds confidence in oneself. What about Cristiano Ronaldo? Why do you think he has so much confidence, so much confidence that people think he's an arrogant human being? Why do you think that is? I think it's because he wasn't born a footballing genius. He had to work his ass off every single day for years. Years of blood, sweat, and tears to get to where he is today. Right? No one gave that to him. He decided he was going to be the best footballer he could possibly be, and he worked toward that goal every day until he realized it. In fact, he continues to realize it, right? Because greatness is a lifestyle. It's a mentality. It's not a destination.

[00:03:32] You wanna party, chase girls, and get drunk with your friends? That's cool. Imma be at the gym working on my endurance, agility, and strength. You're thinking about how much money you can make, but I'm thinking about how I can perform better than my competition, because that always leads to more money. You see what I'm saying? Cristiano Ronaldo has watched himself become one of the best football players to ever play the game professionally. But no one has ever kicked a single ball for him. No one has ever showed up to practice for him. He chose to take on a difficult task, learn a skill and improve it, and to try to be the best version of himself every single day. And from what I understand, he also has an incredibly loving and supportive mother, and that can make any man unstoppable in this game we call life.

[00:04:25] So if you don't feel confident in yourself, if you feel like you have nothing to offer, what do you think you should do? Do something you can be proud of. You're already learning how to communicate in English, and that's something no one can do for you. It's also something no one can take from you. That's something you can be proud of. Commit to hitting the gym consistently and getting in shape, learn how to play the saxophone, go to more social functions and talk to people until you're no longer afraid of them. Quit doing drugs. Create unique and engaging content that can't be found anywhere else. Just do something. Just fucking do something. Anything, bro. Just do something.

[00:05:12] When you have hobbies, when you when you take on difficult tasks, you don't have time to wallow in self-pity and fucking negativity and obsess over all your shortcomings because you're too busy doing shit. You see what I'm saying? You'll have things to talk about when somebody asks you, "What the fuck are you doing with your life?" This naturally makes you a more interesting person, which naturally makes you more confident. You'll come to realize that the only person's approval you really need is your own. When you truly feel good about yourself, you don't really care how other people feel about you.

[00:05:49] So how do you start feeling better about yourself? By working on yourself, by investing in yourself, by spending your time doing difficult, productive, and or creative things voluntarily. So at some point today, I want you to take a long, hard look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself the following. Number one. What exactly...or excuse me, why exactly don't I feel good about myself? Is it because I don't know how to do anything valuable? Is it because of toxic people in my life? What's the reason? What's the source of this feeling? Number two. What's a valuable skill? I'd like to know. Software development, carpentry, sustainable agriculture...it could be anything. It really doesn't matter. And number three, what's the simplest thing I can do to get started immediately? It's hard to spend time feeling bad about yourself when you're already spending all of your free time trying to improve yourself. So get to work.

[END OF EPISODE]

Writing prompts

  • What's a valuable skill you'd like to acquire? Why have you chosen that skill?
  • What's the hardest thing you've ever had to do?
  • When's the last time you achieved something by yourself?
  • Who do you look up to? Why do you admire them?
Key Vocabulary & Grammar Guide
Download the VIP
Key Vocabulary Guide

Transcript

[00:00:00] What's up, my friend? If you're feeling bad about yourself, if you're feeling insecure, if you're feeling like you have nothing to offer the world, then I've got a quick message for you. Now, before I can get my message across to you, I need you to think about something first. Cristiano Ronaldo. Lionel Messi. LeBron James. Gary Vaynerchuk. Jeff Bezos. What do all of these men have in common? You might say things like they're all rich, famous, and the best at what they do. And those things may be true, but there's something even deeper and more important that led them all to be rich, famous, and incredibly successful.

[00:00:45] Confidence. One cannot accomplish great things in life without confidence in oneself. Confidence comes from one or two places. Number one, someone who believes in you so much that you begin to believe in yourself. Number two, watching yourself do something you didn't know or believe you could do in the first place. Now, assuming you don't have the former, because many of us don't, you'll need to do the latter. See what I'm saying? You need to do something. You need to accomplish something.

[00:01:19] And why do you think a lot of people who go to the gym regularly tend to have lots of confidence? It's because they're constantly choosing to do something difficult. They're constantly watching themselves achieve a difficult task. They know that while everyone else is at home on the couch watching Netflix, eating junk food, and scrolling on social media, they are at the gym lifting heavy shit. Not because it's their favorite thing to do in the world, but because they know it's good for them. And I'm obviously generalizing. They know they're neither better nor worse than other people, but they're certainly on a different level. They're the type of people who take on challenges voluntarily and they don't quit when shit gets difficult. They know they're capable of being consistent. They show up again and again and again, month after month, year after year. And they don't see results immediately, and that's okay, because they know how to defer gratification in order to receive a greater reward in the future.

[00:02:26] Watching oneself go from 100 kilos to 75 kilos breeds confidence. It also increases the chance that one will like what they see when they look in the mirror, which will breed even more confidence. And it's also a constant reminder that no matter how bad things get, one is capable of turning one's life around. That knowledge breeds confidence in oneself. What about Cristiano Ronaldo? Why do you think he has so much confidence, so much confidence that people think he's an arrogant human being? Why do you think that is? I think it's because he wasn't born a footballing genius. He had to work his ass off every single day for years. Years of blood, sweat, and tears to get to where he is today. Right? No one gave that to him. He decided he was going to be the best footballer he could possibly be, and he worked toward that goal every day until he realized it. In fact, he continues to realize it, right? Because greatness is a lifestyle. It's a mentality. It's not a destination.

[00:03:32] You wanna party, chase girls, and get drunk with your friends? That's cool. Imma be at the gym working on my endurance, agility, and strength. You're thinking about how much money you can make, but I'm thinking about how I can perform better than my competition, because that always leads to more money. You see what I'm saying? Cristiano Ronaldo has watched himself become one of the best football players to ever play the game professionally. But no one has ever kicked a single ball for him. No one has ever showed up to practice for him. He chose to take on a difficult task, learn a skill and improve it, and to try to be the best version of himself every single day. And from what I understand, he also has an incredibly loving and supportive mother, and that can make any man unstoppable in this game we call life.

[00:04:25] So if you don't feel confident in yourself, if you feel like you have nothing to offer, what do you think you should do? Do something you can be proud of. You're already learning how to communicate in English, and that's something no one can do for you. It's also something no one can take from you. That's something you can be proud of. Commit to hitting the gym consistently and getting in shape, learn how to play the saxophone, go to more social functions and talk to people until you're no longer afraid of them. Quit doing drugs. Create unique and engaging content that can't be found anywhere else. Just do something. Just fucking do something. Anything, bro. Just do something.

[00:05:12] When you have hobbies, when you when you take on difficult tasks, you don't have time to wallow in self-pity and fucking negativity and obsess over all your shortcomings because you're too busy doing shit. You see what I'm saying? You'll have things to talk about when somebody asks you, "What the fuck are you doing with your life?" This naturally makes you a more interesting person, which naturally makes you more confident. You'll come to realize that the only person's approval you really need is your own. When you truly feel good about yourself, you don't really care how other people feel about you.

[00:05:49] So how do you start feeling better about yourself? By working on yourself, by investing in yourself, by spending your time doing difficult, productive, and or creative things voluntarily. So at some point today, I want you to take a long, hard look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself the following. Number one. What exactly...or excuse me, why exactly don't I feel good about myself? Is it because I don't know how to do anything valuable? Is it because of toxic people in my life? What's the reason? What's the source of this feeling? Number two. What's a valuable skill? I'd like to know. Software development, carpentry, sustainable agriculture...it could be anything. It really doesn't matter. And number three, what's the simplest thing I can do to get started immediately? It's hard to spend time feeling bad about yourself when you're already spending all of your free time trying to improve yourself. So get to work.

[END OF EPISODE]

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